literature

Words of Paradise

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mystichuntress's avatar
Published:
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Literature Text

If words could be like birds
Flitting from flower to flower
Honeyed promises
       would drip
               from your lips
And soothe the aching of my soul.
Sweetened vows
like the bird of paradise,
tropical, exotic,
beauty and brilliance
Are duplicitous;
Empty,
holding no more value than to smooth
the ruffled feathers.
Words that are
Estranged from the flight of
       Gestures,
               voice and
                       emotion
can be deceptive.
Nothing but a spectacular display
Of the plumage of charisma and intelligence
Meant only for the courtship dance
And so moults once the chase is over.
...
...
...
If only my love I could pledge
By deeds instead of words.
I need more practise writing poems. So here you go!
© 2012 - 2024 mystichuntress
Comments9
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jtcheney's avatar
:star::star::star::star::star-half: Overall
:star::star::star::star::star-half: Vision
:star::star::star::star::star: Originality
:star::star::star::star::star-half: Technique
:star::star::star::star::star-half: Impact

This poem has many elements that I appreciate: The imagery used in this is utterly phenomenal. Great use of simile to help paint a colorful picture. You have a gift in your imagery.
The actual message of the poem is strong. The way you step your words out from "Gestures, voice, and emotion can be deceptive seems like it throws off the beat a bit, but it actually works here because it throws the flow to a stop and changes the work and moves the reader into another direction.

Indeed my friend, if love could be pledged by deed instead, then pale and fleeting words would nary compare to the luster and brightness of a love more true.

Thanks for sharing. Your style is creative, and I'm glad I took the time to analyze it deeper.